Life is good

Quite different from the life I had half a year ago, these days are more relaxing and it feels like, now, I do take control over my 24 hours. I thought being busy and breathless can make someone stronger and more sophisticated, at least not fooling around and wasting time. Then, after listening to my own feeling, I just realize that there is no reason to push yourself too hard if you don't care any of it.

I know pressure paves the path to success, pushes you up to the sky, and tastes bad. By being stressed out, many people, at the end, take the lead because they put efforts on it. Well, they deserve. But, there are just a world of competitions and contests, how can you be the first place in a row? Who says you must win all the time? When I feel the weight of tension and stress on my shoulder, I have no time to appreciate any little but beautiful things around me. When I'm beat, I know all parts of my body are on protest. When I just rush into a classroom in the morning and think about what I'm gonna do in the afternoon, I notice that I'm not concentrating on anything. I hate my thoughts being cut off. I hate always being in a rush and at the end feeling exhausted in bed. I hate having no time to review my days. Busy days do bring me a lot of achievements. But I need time to construct what I've learn and what I've lost, I need some spaces to look in a mirror and see what I look like, and what I am.

I've wondered what fixing chores and running errands can teach me besides arranging time. Is that necessary to do everything at the same time? Is that a good ability? Unfortunately, I always do one thing each time only. I can't divide myself into several parts to do things. Does it suck? Or isn't that appreciated? I don't know.

I love the way I live for these days. I do, maybe because textbooks are not that disgusting for me. The first semester in freshman year was lame. The second semester in freshman year was totally in a "rush." And now, I love being a sophomore. It's not that lame and not that noisy.